Today was okay and sucky at the same time. Hahaha! I just say "sucky" :P I'm so immature. Anyways, part of the day sucked ass and then some of it was awesome. The beginning of the day did NOT go well for me. I didn't make the poms/dance team for my school. I checked the list several times, only to realize that I hadn't made it. I went to the list in the morning, with my boyfriend and one of my besties. I ran my finger down the list, and my # (#27) wasn't printed on it. I wanted to scream, punch someone, cry. I wanted to wallow in a ball and cry my eyes out. Of course I DID NOT do this, because I was at school. So, whatever. The poms team will suck without me and my 2 friends.
After checking the list MANY times, I told my boyfriend that I hadn't made the team. I mean, I was bummed... BIG time. He said he was so sorry and pulled me into a hug. That moment I wanted to break down and have him hold me. That sounds like I'm a cry baby, but too frickin bad.
During passing period, I would wander towards the list and check over and over again if I made it, and missed it. I saw and confirmed that I had NOT made the team. I fast-walked to my locker and texted my Mom, telling her I had not made it. I seriously wish I was on that team...
Tonight my head hurts like hell. Probably from all the stress that has taken a toll on me today. I had ballet technique so I stretched a LOT. So now my butt muscle and knee bruise are killing me. Great. Well tomorrow is Gay Pride day (rainbow wear), so I will proceed to living my normal life. I am trying to forget about my loss.
I hope tonight I dream of nice things, and I really hope this poms thing doesn't effect me tomrrow... Thanks for reading(:
~Love Always,
Just Another Girl
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