So my bestfriend, (no name given), was supposed to come to the mall with me in like an hour with 3 other girls. She said "yes" and then cancelled about an hour ago... She said that she already made plans with out friend Adam. FO'real. You choose A GUY over your bestfriend? Alright... And now she doesn't want to pick sides so she's not going with either one of us. GREAT.
  But on the bright side, I'm going wit Vinitha, Georgeanne, and Katie :) My bff Mikaela is driving to Mall of America so I miss her -tear- ANYWAYS, I wanted it to be a "ladies day" but she wanted 2 of our guy friends to come. Like, no. I mean, I wish she could've come with but whatever. I'll still have fun with my other friends, right?
  This entry isn't that long, but I wanted to tell you how my day is/gonna be and what happened. OH, and I had the worst Friday night AND Saturday day. On Friday night, I went to someone's house with Mikaela, Vinitha, and Jordan. NO ONE talked to us. That's why we left early... They played "Spin The Bottle" and that's not how I roll. I gotta bf. THEN, yesterday I went to Cole's barmitzvah and no one talked to me except 5 people outta 40. And my bully, the evil devil, and her minions were there too so that's why only 5 people talked to me. I wanted to leave. I hate them. Ugh, it was terrible. I needed to punch a hoe.
  Today will hopefully be better. It's pretty good right now. #snapchatting It's this picture app where you send pics up to 10 seconds and then it disappears. Pretty cool. I'm ADDICTED. Someone get me an intervention :/ Okay, this has been long enough hahaha! 
    Love Always,
Just Another Girl <3

TODAY (:

  Today I was streching my splits for like one and half hours, teehee(: I figured out that if you read a book or watch tv while stretching, you don't think about the pain too much. So, I'M REALLY CLOSE! (huge applause) Yea no. On March 31st, it is me and my boyfriend's 7 month <3 OMG I'M SO EXCITED! I've only been single 10 days out of this school year... Dat shit cray. Excuse my French. Why do people say that? OBVIOUSLY you're speaking in English! Ugh, Norton wants go restart my laptop... Can't it tell that I'm writing my life story? HELLOOOOO TOSHIBA.
  This post is kind of all over the place. Well, I gotta make plans for Spring Break because it's next week #hellyeah And my boyfriend wants to hangout with me at least 2-3 times BUT I'M ONLY OFF 9 DAYS, gahhh! I just got a text from him:
Me: "Wanna hangout this Sunday then Thursday?"
Him: "That's a week from today, but alright I'm gonna miss you like HELL."
  Aww shucks(: So today I had a little quarrel with him. We talked on the phone for 20 mins because I've been getting this TINY, ITTY BITTY feeling that he's starting to like this other girl... I texted him saying it's okay if he liked someone, I just wanted him to tell me. He called and said they're just friends and he doesn't like anyone but me. I thought that was cute, but I still kind of have that feeling... I OVERTHINK TOO MUCH.
  I bought "Perks of Being a Wallflower" 4 days ago, and just finished it last night. Whoa. It changed my life, I swear. I almost cried at the end... Now I'm reading "Peter & The Sword of Mercy". It's 515 pages long(: I love books like that. I'm only on page 5 doe... I'm also stressed out with school. Let me tell you my grades.
Intro Algebra: C+
Science: A
Spanish: A
Honors L.A: A-
Honors Reading: A
P.E: A
S.S: U
 My math teacher didn't upgrade the grades yet, because I gave him corrections. And I retook a test in Social Studies, so she didn't count that. Whatever. So once they update them, I'll have all A's and B's. WOO HOO! This entry is so damn long... Alright well I'm gonna go to bed since it's 10:15pm on a school night.
   Love Always,
Just Another Girl <3

Sorry For Being Me...

I want to leave. I want to get out of here. Why does life have to be so hard? I try to be the best I can be, yet you put me down. I cry almost every night, and I know you do a lot for me but you're making me miserable some days. YES, I will try and make the high school poms team. YES, I WILL eventually get my splits. No, I'm not clinically depressed. No, I'm not suicidal. But some days I feel depressed and sad. And some days, I don't want to be on Earth anymore. Nobody knows. Nobody knows all of the harsh things I go through. Yes, people have it worse than me. Yes, I understand that. One of my friends used to cut and tried to commit suicide. She has had a worse childhood. You do everything for me, and I'm grateful. But you make me depressed because of your constant yelling and threatening to leave. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being me. I'm sorry for what I've done wrong. I'm sorry for not being good enough. I'm sorry for doing enough. I'm just sorry! Okay?
Some days I want to go home and sleep so I can't think of being depressed. I don't need medication, no. No, I'm not insane. I don't cut. I don't try to commit suicide. I don't post sad statuses on Facebook. I don't think of a way to kill myself. I don't do those things. Things just get so stressful, and sometimes I don't want to deal with it, so I lock myself in my room. You don't know how hard it is. Yes, I know people have it WAY worse than me. Don't tell me, I know. I'm not perfect. I'm not the right person. I don't always make the right decisions. I apologize for being me.

Love Always,
Just Another Girl

My Little Insecurties...

 Ugh, for SO LONG I've been insecure about my body... Sure, my friends say how they're fat and I'm skinny, but that's not the case. I'm not gonna go into detail because NOT JUST GIRLS read my blog. I guess all I want is to be skinny. I go to the gym every Tuesday, and then I have dance Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday. So I work out during almost the whole week! I still have this bump on my stomach and I  HATE IT! No, I'm not anorexic, and I don't plan on becoming belimic (idk if I spelled that right). Also, I'm not... average as you would say. I'm "developed up top" yet and I'm absolutely upset about it. I'm a teenager. I should be developed. All of my friends are and it kills me. No, looks aren't everything, but I get bullied for it. I'm crying as I write this because people say "I'm not good enough" or they make fun of me because it. My parents say I'm a late bloomer, but I feel discluded from most girl-talk conversations. This is such a hard topic for me to touch on, but I thought I would share it with you. No, I don't base everything on my looks, but I feel left behind. Why can't I be like the other girls? (skinny, busty, etc.) Why can't I be average? I have only 1 friend that has it just like me, yet she's skinny. Why can't I be normal....?

   P.S. Sorry if you got annoyed by this entry, I don't really care. So, read it if you want.

Love Always,
Just Another Girl </3

Update

 Here's a little update of what happened. Yesterday we SUPPOSED to be called into the office to "talk" about things, but the principal didn't call us down. #Victory! I think since I confronted her, she stopped her crap real quick.UGHHH, I just want to leave my school for a week... I want to fly away like a bird, away from this drama, and be free... I want to sleepover at a friends house over an entire weekend, and go to the city. I just want to leave my school for a WEEK! She is terrible. I DESPISE her. I hate her with a burning passion... The thing I'm mad about, is that.. I was nice to her! I was her friend when no one else was... Even though she was with/liked many guys, I still was her friend. But I KNEW she was a bad seed.
  The other girl involved has been my friend since April 2012. I trusted her. I was her friend when she felt insecure. I encouraged her, and complimented her when she felt TERRIBLE about herself. Then, on 12-26-12, the girl I hate and my "friend" had a sleepover. They texted my bf all this crap about me, trying to break us up... I found out, and now of course I hate her. I TRUSTED HER!!! And she went behind my back with this girl I absolutely can't stand! Now she still wants to be friends, but I'm like, no. I can't become friends with someone like that. Do you think I should? I don't know... I guess I just need to get by three more days of this...
Love,
Just Another Girl </3

Drama...

  For all of my viewers out there, middle school is not as cracked up as people say... Jealous girls are gonna start shit about you and you have to push through it. Today, I confronted the girl doing stuff to me and now the school is involved. GREAT, right? I confronted her calmly and nicely, but she got all defensive and denied EVERYTHING. Well, I told my mom and then she got an email. Her mom totally bitched my mom out, and I wanted to go punch the girl and HER in the face when I read it! This is NOT MY FAULT! I wanted to cry, but my mom said to stand my ground... Sometimes I don't want to go to school. I know I have the least kind of bullying going on, but it still hurts. I'm NOT suicidal and I'm NOT crazy, but sometimes I just want to leave Earth... I'm crying as I write this because NO ONE can help me ): The principal can't do anything, and he's gonna take HER side!! When I had trouble with another girl, he didn't choose sides. But tomorrow I might get called into the office... My friend said that to relieve the stress, listen to music. THAT doesn't help me. Her house is just a few streets down, and I wanna go yell at her & tell her to leave me the eff alone! ~sighs~ I need someone to help me. Sure, I have my bestest friends. You know that movie "Freaky Friday"? Well, I wish my mom could be in my shoes in a day, and get everything done with. She's more "out there" when it comes to this kind of thing. I'm too nice... Why? All I have to ask, is Why?...
Love,
Just Another Girl </3

My Dog

I just read an entry out of my diary... It said my dog, 8 years of age, started to have a tumor on his butt at 2-10-12. That was TEN MONTHS ago. He still is suffering from this cancerous disease, and I just finished crying my eyes out. I hadn't realized my dog, my first dog ever, was suffering for almost a year... Why does this have to happen to him?! I love this dog TO DEATH, and he is close to DIEING in a matter of a couple of years! I'm tearing up just writing this entry. I need someone. I can't lose him... ),;